Calling Myself Out?!?

Ok, time for some truth telling...gulp! I have been blaming my...uhhhh...lack of ability to stick to my plan on my sister and family. Basically saying (to myself) that I can't eat good or exercise well because of the food they bring in the house and the interruptions they cause to my schedule.

Well, they went away for TWO WEEKS and guess what???? Yep, that's right, I still had the same problems, IF NOT WORSE! You can see that my stats have not changed and there is NO EXCUSE for that!

I keep changing who I blame for my 'inability' to stick to things and I have to admit, it's me.

I heard something (again) recently that you all may have heard before...

"you do what you expect not what you desire."

You see, I DESIRE to lose weight and tone up. I long to look like one of the fitness models, but at the very least, to get rid of a good amount of fat so you can SEE how hard I work and the muscle hidden under there.

However, I EXPECT myself to go all 'gun ho' and then fail after a day or two.

Quite frankly, I'm not sure how to 're-program' my mind. It's not due to lack of research either. I have listened to many things on NLP (Neuro-linguistic programming). In human terms (hehe), it is reprogramming your mind in order to change your behaviors.

After all I've listened to and read (which is definitely not exhaustive), I still find myself lost on accomplishing this. At least I recognize this is a problem, right?

I need to focus on this more but some other steps also. For example, right now the whole family is eating. I ate an 1-1/2 hours ago and am not hungry. I do WANT to eat but I don't NEED to eat. I have to start evaluating food on a want/need basis.

Everyone has a different dream they are chasing and a different way of achieving it. Different things work for different people. I need to stop chasing everyone else's way and make my own.